Power in the Unexpected

Spill the Beans

‘Some people really think they’ve got all the answers don’t they?’ said Tom.

‘Go on’ prompted Lisa

Tom and Lisa had been friends for a while. There was a little chemistry between them, but they weren’t yet at the friends with benefits stage, if you catch my drift. It was warm and dry in the cafe.

‘Well there’s this guy, whose book I’m reading at the moment, reckons if you’ve got an issue with health or addictions or whatever, all you need to do, is imagine you’re the last person on earth, and all your problems will disappear.’

‘Sounds a bit simplistic to me, what’s his reasoning?’ asked Lisa

Tom now had a cynical lilt to his voice, ‘His reasoning is based on old philosophical stuff relating to control and will and all that. He’s basically saying that illness and addictions are only a means of control. He’s saying that we spend most of our time wrapped up in seeking to get the love and attention, we lacked in childhood, through the control of others. He reckons being the last person on earth, or imagining you are, is likely to enlighten you to the truth of your condition.’

‘Wow, bit left field that Tom, why are you reading it anyway?’

‘I saw it on Amazon, the title got me. It’s called Power in the Unexpected. It’s about gaining personal power, and how that can be found in unexpected ways.’

‘Power in the Unexpected’ repeated Lisa. ‘Punchy title that, found in all good book shops… and Amazon hey?’

‘Actually you’d be surprised, there’s some good self published books out there, they’re not all vanity stuff you know.’ said Tom

‘And now he’s defending something he was cynical about a minute ago.’ mocked Lisa.

‘Oh bollocks to ya, I just though you might be interested.’

‘Umm, well maybe I am… a little. Anyway, what problems do you have, that are likely solved by imagining yourself as the last person on earth?’ enquired Lisa.

‘Now you ask I have this thing with sugar. You know I gave up smoking some years ago?’ Lisa responded with a nod, ‘Well, the more I’ve read the more I understand my sugar habit is just replacing the fags.’

‘And your point?’

‘The point, my dear cynical friend, is if I was the last person on earth there’d be no shops open selling Mars bars!’

‘Oh fuck off!’ said Lisa, a little too loudly. She blushed.

‘Actually, the point is, if I were the last person on earth, our man reckons what’s most likely to happen, is I’d have to take responsibility for my health, and not unconsciously seek this from someone else. I know for a fact, eating too much sugar is going to lead to health problems in the future, but it seems our of my control. Our man is saying, if you don’t have control over the self, you’re likely seeking this over someone else. You’re exerting control over others by creating concern in them and their unconscious need to take care of you. He reckons whole governments are being hoodwinked by the minds of the neglected.’

‘Jesus Tom, I’m not sure about that, but did you know loads of Victorians died of teeth.’

‘Teeth?!’ exclaimed Tom

‘Yeah, teeth, that’s what they used to put on their death certificates when it was rotten teeth, abscesses and infections that killed them. People died of teeth.’

Tom was just nodding his head, and not in the positive. ‘That, what you’ve just done there, is what our man would call the-will-to-power. You’ve just tried to trump my conversation with some bullshit about teeth. You’ve just tried to exert your greater will over me with something about fucking teeth.’

‘As we both know Tom, my will is, and will always be, greater than yours. The reason I mentioned teeth, is because if you were the last man on earth, not only would there be no shops, there’d be no dentists to pull out your rotten bloody teeth. And it is the case, and lets not forget it’s an unconsciously thing, I am seeking to take care of you. You’re my beautiful baby! Now get me another coffee will you, oh, and a Flapjack, I’m bastard starving!’

‘Fuck… hot milk with your Americano darling?’

Emotions: The Root of Our Beliefs


It’s either misunderstood, or more likely, denied

We try so very hard to change and find the solutions to our problems. When it comes to the mind, there are those of us, who place the same level of importance on understanding it, as say, understanding life itself. So how is it, so many of these seeking-explorers, come up short?

Put simply the difficulty lies in what’s at the very root of belief: Emotions

When very small and young our emotions are the only means of expressing our needs. At that time, of dependent vulnerability, our emotions were a direct reflection of this: raw and strongly felt. Untamed and running wild, our emotions ruled us, as often as they ruled others. Some adults would have deemed our emotions as inappropriate or plainly wrong.

Adults often feel threatened, or even fearful of their children’s wild untamed emotions, and have limited resources in knowing how to deal with them. This is especially the case, if they still have limited control, over their own. This fear is often felt as a threat by children. At an unconscious level it can be perceived as a threat to their very survival. So instead of expressing emotions, they’re locked up inside. They become repressed, and unless provoked, that’s where they will stay.

It’s often these repressed emotions driving our most limiting beliefs

Of course, as far as the mind is concerned, to revisit these emotions – so to release their pent-up energy – is forbidden. We must understand, the unconscious mind has no awareness, of the passage of time. It has no chronology. With this understanding in place, we can see, if it was inappropriate to express certain emotions back then, why should that have changed now? 

Think of your most powerful memory

Is that memory any weaker as a result of the passage of time? And when you close your eyes, does the memory feel like the event, is happening now? Indeed, the unconscious understanding, is just that. It is happening now. Everything in the unconscious is happening now. Nothing is date stamped. There is no such thing as unconscious chronology.

Think of those times when you’ve been so engaged with a repetitive activity, that your sense of time, was lost. Repetitive activities become time-eating because they’re unconscious. Furthermore, the unconscious doesn’t know when to wake you in the morning; it’s your consciousness doing that. There is no internal clock. Yet there are internally stored beliefs fuelled by your memories and emotions. There is such a deep, deep beauty, in that. Many of us hold happy memories from years ago, that when thought of now, provoke emotional responses.

In order to defend itself your mind will look to discredit these words. You may have already done so

And so there it is. We will seek the answers to our problems, and when found, we’ll either misunderstand them, or just deny their truth. We’ll find ways to discredit the theories, or we’ll just plain shut them from our minds. This is the power of our beliefs, and the repressed emotions, driving them. It’s the unconscious ability to protect us from ourselves you see. What we must help the unconscious mind understand though, is we would like to grow, right now.

It may be hard to accept – where the root of negative beliefs lie – yet unless we’re prepared to take charge of our minds, and understand how it defends itself, our limiting beliefs are here to stay.  

Moreover, even though you may find limiting beliefs mentioned a lot nowadays, you will need to become actively, physically involved, in erasing them. The time, and associated emotions of when a belief was formed, can be repressed, and forgotten. Right now though, this locked-up energy, can be sufficient to bring us down. 

The powerful and proven GOLD Counselling Methodology – established over twenty years ago – is exclusively taught on Freedman College Development Workshops. Would you like to grow? You can find your application form here.